A few days ago, an article was published in the Daily Item regarding a letter that several Midd-West School District parents sent out to the media. On behalf of my cousin Brandon, his family, and his friends, I would like to clarify what we are trying to accomplish with the Midd-West School District along with all other school districts in the country.
Since Brandon’s death, which he attributed to constant bullying and harassment at school and on the bus, his memorial website has received countless e-mails and posts detailing horrific bullying that is happening not only at Midd-West, but at other schools across the country.
Because our family and those close to Brandon now have to deal with the harsh reality of losing someone so young, promising and kind, we are dedicated to spreading tolerance, bullying awareness and suicide prevention. Until you experience a loss so devastating, you cannot understand how we feel. You may sit there and say “that will never happen to my son/daughter/friend/niece/nephew” but Brandon is proof that it could and may very well happen if the prevalent hate in our society continues on its current path.
Our intent is not to bash the Midd-West School District at their school board meetings. But please, understand that it’s frustrating when other school districts have made valiant efforts to promote togetherness amongst their students and celebrate differences, while Midd-West seems to be turning a blind eye to the situation. The body language and attitude at the school board meetings, when bullying is brought up, is defensive and insensitive.
Hatred and intolerance is a cycle, a cycle that seems to be spinning out of control in our country. Brandon’s family and friends simply want to act as a think tank, a group that will volunteer and share ideas to better improve the educational environment. The rash outbreak of suicides across the country are proof that bullying is out of control and creative actions need to be taken to prevent further tragedies.
Brandon’s mother Tammy and step-father Palmer have hosted several meetings with family, friends and supporters regarding bullying since Brandon’s death. These meetings have generated a plethora of ideas for Midd-West and other school districts that can be used to prevent and combat bullying and harassment. These actions are necessary because the state legislature’s and school district’s bullying policies are vague at best.
THE IDEAS:
• Elect a school anti-bullying/harassment specialist. Students need to have a respected and nonjudgmental adult that they can turn to. This specialist should undergo training on how to deal with bullying, harassment, and intolerance.
• Establish a safe haven for students. Teachers should make extra effort to let their students know that their differences are okay and that if they are having any problems, they can turn to them. Harvey Edwards, a teacher at Selinsgrove High School and the school’s Tolerance Troop leader, is a prime example of this. Every teacher should strive to be as accepting, levelheaded and open as Mr. Edwards. Students at Selinsgrove know that in Mr. Edwards’ room, they area not judged, they are not harassed and they have someone to turn to.
• Ensure that school records are transferred. Brandon’s middle school records of bullying and counseling were not transferred to the high school. Records should be transferred and teachers should review incoming classes so they have an idea of what is going on within the student body. This preventative task will allow teachers to pay special attention to possible problems with students.
• Redefine consequences. Many students find an allure in out of school suspension (OSS), which is sometimes given to students after several cases of bullying, harassment, violence. If a student is punished for bullying/harassment, they should be required to undergo in-school classes educating them about acceptance of others and the consequences of bullying. These types of punishments are much better than assigning OSS so the student can sit at home playing video games and surfing the internet.
• An anonymous tip box. A tip box should be placed in a central area of schools so that bullying/harassment/other issues can be reported anonymously. Usually the bullied and bystanders are afraid to speak up because they are afraid the bullying will get worse. A box like this, monitored by an outside volunteer, is a sure-fire way to monitor the issues inside the school.
• Accept free help. Schools should be willing to accept free help from anti-bullying and other groups promoting tolerance. The only investment is time and if a program will improve the well-being of a student, it’s unquestionably worth it.
• Promote tolerance. Schools should promote tolerance in any way they can, every single day. Students spend nearly half of their awake hours in school or in school-related activities and it’s where they learn the most during their maturing years. Once we groom our youth on accepting differences – no matter race, religion, sexuality, weight, height, etc. – bullying and harassment should naturally decrease.
Prevention, education and tolerance are the key ideas here. If schools continue to conform to the bare minimum, every child is in danger. Sure, maybe a certain child’s issue was dealt with, but what about the child who went unnoticed? This is not an individual problem, it is a societal one, and until we can accept each other for who we are as individuals, bullying and harassment will never stop.
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